She's JV to your varsity
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
