Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
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