just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
