2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
