No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
