Don't make out with my wife yet
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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