Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
