You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
