I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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