The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
