Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
he wants to bone in the snuggie
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
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