atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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