what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
