How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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