sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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