Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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