In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
