I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I just cut my nipple shaving
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
