i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
