what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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