Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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