I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize