no, he came in my armpit
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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