I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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