and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I just gift wrapped bread.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
