It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Randomize
