Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
