the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
