how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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