can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
