the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
