You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
cat food counts as protein by the way
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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