did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize
