I am puke
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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