i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
