what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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