they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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