fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
My vagina is very pro this idea
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
