Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Randomize