so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
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Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
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Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
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