Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
