chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize