I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
love makes seman taste better
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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