just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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