You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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