I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize