First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize