What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
