So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
please come you make the beer taste better
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
