i just google imaged poop.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
