I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize